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It was from someone asking if she was looking for a co-parent, and it just happened to be from the very same man she’d seen on the website before, who was living in Australia.
He was gay, and from New York, and shared her beliefs about spirituality—she describes herself as spiritual, but not religious. She liked that he was dark-haired, since she is blonde, and figured they might make a good-looking kid, and they agreed on lots of things.
It’s not just single women looking for involved parenting partners, either.
The two broke up and Pieke found herself in a tailspin: She knew she wanted a family, but she also knew her biological clock was ticking, and she wasn’t sure, after two separate, decades-long relationships, that she could go through it all again.
A glass of wine in hand, she steeled herself for more dating, signed up for Match.com, and started going on dates in Omaha, Nebraska, where she lives.“I thought, ‘These guys look like jerks...
I’m not going to wait on guys anymore.’”It’s been decades since Louise Joy Brown, the first “test-tube” baby was born, allowing women to have biological children through in-vitro fertilization, and without a husband.
Since then, millions of babies have been born to single women, through both natural conception and in-vitro, who couldn’t find the right partner or want to go it on their own.
She paid a small fee and registered, and right away, a guy in Australia caught her eye. Everyone she knew thought she was crazy to even consider having a child with a stranger.“My family and friends thought I was nuts, they were like, ‘chill out, you’ll meet someone,’” she said.
“But I thought, ‘wow, this could maybe be something.’”A few months later, Pieke was on the Facebook page of the co-parenting site and she got a message.
A Florida judge last year allowed the names of three parents on a birth certificate after a sperm donor sued a lesbian couple, who had been his friends, after they asked him to cede parental rights.
Last October, California amended its family code to provide that a child can have more than two parents.
Sites like Modamily.com, Pollen and serve as places for people to meet potential co-parents: They’re kind of like a for people who want to have kids without having sex.“This could be a seismic shift in how people view what a family is,” said Ivan Fatovic, the founder and CEO of Modamily, which launched in Feburary 2012.
Fatovic started the site after talking with some girlfriends in a bar in New York: They were all approaching 40, and hadn’t found a mate, and were worried about finding the right partner for them—and father for their children—in a few short years.